Beware the World of Kardashia

Are we all dumb? Really? It’s the question I continue to ask myself every time I read a headline or hear a talk show pundit dive into the world of Kardashia, a vast expanse of shallowness and self-lust that sucks you in like a Dyson.

Raise your hands if you really thought that Kim Kardashian’s marriage to Kris Humphries was going to work, that divorce wasn’t going to be a part of this fairy tale. Go ahead, there’s no judging here. Rather than ridiculing you, maybe it’s that kind of naiveté, that innocence, so to speak, that keeps us all from being totally crusted over in such a cynical state that it’s nearly impossible to break through? Maybe.

The rest of us saw that “marriage” for what it was, a runaway train that took 72 days to run off the rails, with Ryan Seacrest and E! executives raking in the dough with every twist and turn. There’s no word on how much money in advertising they made for the two-part “Fairy Tale” wedding, however it was enough to ensure that Kim was paid a reported $17 million. When you do the math, in the 72 days she was married to Humphries, she made roughly $9,837 an hour.

“What down economy, bitches?” she didn’t say publicly, but probably wanted to.

Meanwhile, gays across the land collectively asked themselves whether this was the kind of sanctity of marriage evangelical Christians were talking about?

And as public sentiment starts to sway against Kim and everything Kardashian, the very mention of her name is now followed by a punchline, perhaps the rest of us can take solace in the fact that another Hollywood twit’s act is getting old. Lindsey Lohan looks to be going to jail for violating her parole. The once innocent face of Disney will now reportedly pose for Playboy.

Somewhere, Paris Hilton is seething at the mouth like a lizard, wondering just what in the hell she has to do stay relevant.

But to the original question, we aren’t dumb. Not all of us, anyway. If we really want to know the truth, the Kardashians, the Lohans, the Housewives et al are our guilty pleasures. They are here to remind us that there are people more effed up in the world than we are. There’s a reason why Jersey Shore cast member Pauly D was a failed Halloween costume this year.

And as a father of three girls I can simply point to Lindsey or Kim and say, “You see what happens when you don’t listen to your parents? You become a whore. Now go and make me a sandwich.”

Or something like that… And for this, in some bizarre way, I’m both disgusted for Kim and thankful.

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